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Nebulae by seaboundstars

Literature by xXI-Feel-InfiniteXx

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Submitted on
June 12


189 (who?)
The night my mother died, the horse in the barn started singing.

Its neck bulged, veins sticking out like ropes around a hanged man's throat. The old blind eyes stared at nothing, dumbly terrified of the same.

"Shut up, you old dumb bitch," I snapped at it. It had been my mother's horse. Better than a lawnmower, cheaper than a car, she used to say. But for the last few years, it had been too sick to eat and too weak to ride or pull a cart. It just stood in its stall, swaying on its broomstick legs and heaving its eyelids up and down over its smoggy eyes. We'd been an odd trio—my mom, her horse, and me. She refused to kill it, and it had probably been a better daughter to her than I had anyway.

They'd both started spitting out teeth as they aged, joined in an inter-species sisterhood I couldn't begin to understand. Lumps of bone tumbled out of their jaws and left behind muculent yellow holes emptier than any tooth ever could have filled. I remember the first one my mother lost. The image of her slumped in the bathroom, crying. Just there, and crying. "Oh, Missy, look! You can see it when I smile!"

I cried, too—later, alone, because my mother had never so much as broken a bone.

"I ought to take you out back and shoot you," I told the horse. The animal vomited sound into the empty well of the barn, and in the thin moonlight I caught the glint of its last tooth nestled in the straw.
This has been sitting in my notebook for well over six months now, and I would love critique on it if anyone has something to offer. Most importantly, I'm wondering: Does it ring true emotionally, and does it reach some sort of point/have some kind of meaning?


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Daily Deviation

Given 2014-06-30
Power in brevity: My Mother's Horse is by Kathryn-Walt. ( Featured by neurotype )
Chipchinka Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014   Writer
Daily deviation huh?  Yep!  It's definitely worth it!  Brilliant and congratulations!
Feel free to write more!
19375 Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2014
I love this so much. Incredibly poignant. <3
Kathryn-Walt Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2014
Thank you! :heart:
LittleThings1 Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, I sure am glad you got it out of your notebook, because this story is very thought-provoking and well written. Incredible work and I could not think of another person that deserves a DD more than this piece of writing. There's an eerie feel to this, but happy, yet sad, yet....I don't even know how to explain it, but its amazing. Keep it up you're going places with this kind of writing :) w00t! w00t! w00t! w00t! w00t! w00t! 
Kathryn-Walt Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2014
Oh, wow, such high praise! Thank you very much! :heart:
LittleThings1 Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
It's no problem! Hope to see more:hugs: Hug 
FrostedFrozen Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2014  Student Digital Artist
I loved it!
TheGalleryOfEve Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Congratulations on your well-deserved DD!!! :iconflyingheartsplz::iconlainloveplz::iconflyingheartsplz: :clap::clap::clap:
I’m very happy for you!!! :iconloveloveplz: :tighthug:
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